I’m so excited to bring you our first Voices of Motherhood episode where I get to have conversations about motherhood with the most amazing women just like you! Everyone’s story is different and I’ve found there’s such beauty in how we can relate with each other’s journey.
My guest today is Emily Conley. Emily is an incredibly talented copywriter for heart-centered coaches and online service providers that lives in Nashville with her husband and 3-year-old daughter. We hired her back in June to help us launch the Nourished Motherhood Collective and I’m just blown away at how she captures my voice in a way that’s not only compelling but is full of fun and heart. She’s become a good friend over the past few months and I’m honored that her story gets to kick off our Voices of Motherhood series!
Emily’s motherhood story is filled with grace and so much wisdom. In this episode, she shares about her journey into motherhood after being diagnosed with PCOS, how she’s learned to find joy in the simple, everyday moments, and what it was like to give birth on the other side of the world thousands of miles away from her family and community.
Moments You Don’t Want to Miss
[6:25] Discover how Emily's been inspired to enjoy the simple moments and new adventures through the eyes of her daughter
[12:20] Learn how Emily's PCOS diagnosis at 17 impacted her plans to have kids and how that all changed one day at an Australian aquarium
[17:35] Discover what she did to help overcome her PCOS, lose 80 pounds and get pregnant right away
[27:05] Learn what it was like being pregnant in the middle of winter (without a car) in Australia
[31:40] Listen to Emily's spa-like experience at the hospital where they served high tea & cakes
[36:15] Find out how her beautiful birth went anything but according to plan
[40:50] Hear about Emily's struggle with postpartum anxiety and the moment the fog lifted and started feeling like herself again
Kelly Jo: How has working from home during the pandemic prepared you and your family for where you’re at today? Have there been any tips or tricks you've learned along the way to make life a little easier?
Emily: Yeah, I let go of my rules. I learned to have some grace with myself and be like...you know what...if I have a client call and my husband also has a meeting at the same time...it's not going to be the end of the world if my three-year-old watches a show. Before, I think I would have felt very guilty about that and had a lot of rules in place.
It's also made me a lot more intentional with my time. Before the pandemic, I was really bad about trying to work while I was with my daughter. She was running around my office while I was trying to work and I wasn’t doing anything well. Now when she’s in preschool, it's full steam ahead to get all my work done. Then when she's home, I can be fully present with her, which is really nice for all of us.
Emily: I think before the pandemic I felt like I had to be on an international trip to really be adventuring, like going to Bali or whatever, which is great and fun. But I think finding the simple adventure and pleasure in those daily moments has been really great in this season.
Kelly Jo: I feel like that's a lot of motherhood too. There's a lot of mundane moments, right? There's a lot of dirty house dishes, diapers, and just to be able to find the joy and the simplicity... I think it's a key to actually enjoying motherhood. Would you agree?
Emily: I totally agree. Yes. Otherwise, you're just miserable. And I think I struggled with that at first. I was used to having a really exciting life. We were always doing big adventurous things. And that was really hard for me to adjust to. I was like…how is this fun? I have a three-month-old on a little blanket in front of me rolling around and learning to be like, “Oh, she rolled over!” And discover that this is now exciting. Those little things were really hard for me at first and it’s taken me three years to get here but now I love it.
Getting Pregnant With PCOS Naturally
Kelly Jo: In your mind you thought you couldn't get pregnant because of your PCOS diagnosis. Did you do anything to treat your PCOS or make your body more healthy? What was that journey like for you?
Emily: So when I moved to Australia, we didn't have a car and we walked everywhere. The bus was a 15-minute walk from my house so even if I was taking the bus somewhere, I walked half an hour round trip. We joined a gym and ate differently. The food is just different over there. The meat is processed differently and we had access to a lot better produce. My husband and I made a conscious effort to start eating in a very balanced way. It wasn't really anything dramatic.
You know, we had to walk everywhere which is really hard when you're overweight. But we knew we needed to help ourselves. And so I had lost about 80 pounds over the course of a year. And it just kind of happened. It was really easy because I just changed the way I was living. I know that made a big difference because I got pregnant very quickly and very easily and until the end had a very healthy, simple problem-free pregnancy.
Advice To A New Mom
Kelly Jo: If you could go back to those early moments when you first found out you were pregnant, what's one thing you would tell her yourself at that stage that you've learned just in these last four years?
I would say two things. One is that this is not your life forever. It does get better. But then it also gets worse. It's really a roller coaster, especially in that first year. I’d just keep reminding myself to be in the moment and that you're gonna make it.
The second thing is to be more aware of myself. In retrospect, I now realize that I had really bad postpartum anxiety for about 6 months though I had no idea at the time. I had these moments where I wasn’t myself at all. And no one around me said anything. People just tried to accommodate me. Now I would tell myself to pay attention to your own needs. Your baby matters, but you do too mama.
Own Your Mom Brand
Kelly Jo: Is there anything you want to share before we wrap up this conversation?
Emily: I talk to business owners all the time about finding your voice. You have to own your voice and be yourself and I think that's so true for mothers too.
There's not just one kind of mother. I've become so much more confident and I've enjoyed being a mom so much more, when I have embraced my version of it. It's my own brand of motherhood. If I could share anything with anyone becoming a mom or in the middle of it, it’d be this...embrace your own version of what motherhood is supposed to look like. Own your mom brand. You will just be so much happier. And there's so much less self-doubt.
My kid doesn't wear really cute matching clothes. She wears play shorts. Before, I would see my friend’s kids with huge bows and monogrammed outfits and be like, “Oh, that's so cute...I'm a bad mom, because I don't do that.”
Now I'm like, that's great that that works for you. My kid's gonna be running around in a T-shirt and some gym shorts and she’s just as happy.
Kelly Jo: Oh, I love that! I love the quote that comparison is the thief of joy. I feel like that’s what you're saying about owning motherhood, right? It's taking that comparison out the window so that you can truly enjoy it. And that's so powerful.
More from Emily Conley
There were so many nuggets of wisdom in this conversation and Emily’s story of giving birth on the other side of the world, away from her family and friends, was fascinating!
You can find Emily online at her website and on Instagram. If you’re looking for a really fun, positive copywriter + business coach with words that’ll speak to your client’s heart and blow you away...Emily’s your gal 😉
Links & Resources Mentioned
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September 30, 2021